Hangin’ with my Lady friends and Mr. Honey Bear (Deluxe) and The Grim Reaper re-visits Squirrel Town

As my loyal readers (and fans) are very aware, I have a number of Lady friends who enjoy spending time with me.  Last week My Dad and I picked up Kaya and her Mom for a drive to White Pines State Park, about two hours west of where we live in the Chicago area.  Since it was a week day, we did not see any other dogs or people during our three hour hike on the trails.

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This is me with Kaya after we ran down to the river for exploring and a drink.  Kaya likes to be the boss and I am OK with her being the boss.

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Here is an example of Kaya being the boss.  We are in My Dad’s Scion xB and Kaya is sitting up front – without permission.  I told her, “Kaya, stay in the back with me.”  But she didn’t.

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This Cattle Dog is named Scarlet.  The first time we met, she growled at me – FOR NO REASON!  She has been trying to correct her behavior with me.  She comes right up next to me and just looks at me “what, no second chances?”…and I walk away.  Sorry Scarlet, no second chances, at least for now.

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This is Brandy – remember, THE DEMONIC SCHIZOID???  She visited last week for about an hour.  She really enjoys my attentions…cheek pulling, gripping, rear leg nibbling.  And every so often she goes all Demonic on me and puts me on the ground, just to remind me that she can…whenever she wants to.

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Brandy and me in the Scion xB.  We share the rear windows, but remember that Brandy is THE BOSS, and a lot more bossy than Kaya.

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This is Bear…remember the “open carry” three-legged Shar-Pei from Texas.  My Dad visits him every day so he can take a whizzz.  Bear wants to get “friendly” with me but it can be a a challenge to hold onto a 58 pound Border collie when you have only three legs…but he keeps trying.  Sometimes I have to give Bear some “eye” just to keep him in line.  Surprisingly, he knows what “eye” means and he says, “Sorry.”

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Mid 70’s in Chicago, yesterday, and My Dad took me for an “off-leash” in the Forest Preserve.  I could hear squirrels to my right.  And while we are on the topic of squirrels, I had a catch ‘n kill last week at the dumpster enclosure.  The squirrel thought I was on the north side of the fence and he took a leap to freedom (he thought) from the south side….into the air and right into my mouth.  A mid-air snag as I returned from the north side of the  enclosure.  Gotta pay attention is what I always say…

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THE CANINE THERAPIST FOR CANINES and THE TOY COLLECTOR

My Dad poured some old cereal outside today and the squirrels were there within…

“What?  Well, the squirrels eating the cereal happened a few minutes ago.  No, I don’t believe I need a new title…  Yes, yes, yes, I’ll get to my skills as a canine-therapist…yes, I will not forget to mention what happened at Patrick’s house.  Isn’t there a National Geographic that needs to be read?”

My Dad is always sticking his nose in when I start posting to MY blog…mmmph.  Well, anyway, I sat by the slider today watching the devil-may-care antics of six, maybe seven, squirrels, who were all jostling and positioning and arguing over which of them was going to sit on a pile of cereal My Dad had poured on the grass.  A mere seven feet separates me from my furry tormentors; their tails twitching, all hunched up as they chow-down on the cereal.  Last week by the dumpster, I out-smarted one of the garbage raiders…he chose the wrong exit point just as I was coming around the southwest corner of the trash enclosure.  I had him in my front paws, like trying to juggle…..a moving squirrel!  My Dad said that my squirrel catching efforts reminded him of Devil Sticks (see image).

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Devil Sticks.  Think of my paws as the handheld sticks and the third stick as the squirrel.  Well, that’s what My Dad saw

My Dad keeps asking me,

“And what would you do if you caught a squirrel, is that really your goal, or, you just like to scare them?”

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“Open the slider  s-l-o-w-l-y   so I can get a better view…”

 

My Dad continues to be amazed and flabbergasted at my ability to size up dogs, male and female, engage in some subtle communication, and have them playing with me within five minutes.  Although, I’ll have to admit, that getting the girls to play with me is pretty easy.  Crabby dogs, aggressive dogs, shy dogs, and dogs with self-esteem issues are no match for me.  A few pushes with my nose, backwards hopping, butt-up, head tilts and just ignoring them works the magic.  If I haven’t convinced them within 5 minutes, or so, I sit down with my back to them – they can’t stand it.  One Shi-Tsu, I met last month, whose name shall remain CONFIDENTIAL, was very yappy and snarly with me.  So, I ignored him.  Within minutes, while I was enjoying a chewy, he climbed on my back and started some suggestive movements – over and over and over – for the next hour.  Next time I looked at him he was taking a nap, go figure!  My Dad told me that Shi-Tsu was Chinese for moron…I’ll have to Google that.

Oh yes, I was a Patrick’s for a post-Thanksgiving dinner.  Patrick and I are good friends but throw another canine into the mix and he becomes MR. BOSSMAN…a character flaw I must stay alert to.  But Patrick does have a lot of toys and chew toys and I enjoyed rounding up those toys on the couch where I was relaxing.

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The Toy Collector at work

And some sad news…my dog-friend Bob, the Shar-Pei, was walking with his mom, Mary (I like her a lot!), one morning, and he was attacked by an Akita who had pulled away from his owner.  Bob was mortally wounded and was euthanized at the vet.

But, some good news also.  Mary adopted a young Shar-Pei, last week. He is from Texas and barks with a  d-r-a-w-l.  He is an “open-carry” guy.  He has had a tough beginning to his life and he can prove it – HE HAS ONLY THREE LEGS.  I stopped by his new forever home two days after his arrival.  He is a nice guy and we became friends immediately, go figure!

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My new friend, BEAR.  He is a Tripawd.  He is EXTREMELY sweet.

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Showing BEAR that I trust him.  He barks with a d-r-a-w-l…he is from Houston, TX.  BEAR said something about starting his own blog, http://www.adognamedbear.com

 

 

 

QUESTIONNAIRE FROM BORDER COLLIE BEHAVIORAL CONTROL INSTITUTE (BCBCI)

Play-fighting with BOB...I am his first dog friend.

Play-fighting with BOB…I am his first dog friend.

“Magic, you have an email, looks important…”

“What…something about my $23 million  inheritance from Nigerian relatives, and I am required to pay a $1,000 transfer fee?”

“Ha!  I can tell you are on my laptop WAY too much.  Wait, you don’t respond to those scam emails…do you?”

“Mmmm…sort of, I tell them I will meet them at the airport in Lagos, give them the tail number of my Gulfstream IV, and that I will be arriving with my security force of 12 former special forces dudes…they never get back me…what a shock…so just what is this important email?

“They want you to answer some questions, looks sort of personal, something from the BCBCI. looks VERY official.”

“Yawn…OK…why don’t you wash the Scion xB, or play Scrabble, or something…let me take care of my own affairs…mmm…let me see…”

BORDER COLLIE BEHAVIORAL CONTROL INSTITUTE

COWLEY ROAD, CAMBRIDGE CB4OWS, UNITED KINGDOM

Dear Mr. Magic, 

As you are well aware, ALL Border collies are required to submit to an annual behavioral review.  The required form is attached and should be reviewed with ALL questions answered by midnight, 15 July 2015.  Thank you for your anticipated cooperation.

Please provide information on your relationship with other canines, including Border collies:

I get along with everyone.  My main girlfriends are Kaya, Brandy, and Coco.  Siri is a female Border collie and I am in negotiations with her for play fighting that is a bit more aggressive.  Coco is a small Maltese and I will lay down next to her so we can play.  She allows me to nibble on her legs.  Bob, a Shar-Pei, is another good friend.  I am his first dog friend.

Please provide information on fears, anxieties, and unusual behaviors on your part:

I am not afraid of thunder.  I am not afraid of fireworks. I am not afraid of any dogs…I stand my ground.  I enioy going with My Dad in the Scion xB.  My Dad always has water for me in the car and we frequently stop for hamburgers.  I have some concerns about sewer grates, manhole covers, and drainage openings…I am very careful when walking around them.

Please provide information on your favorite chew toys:

My Dad’s sunglasses are a favorite.  Bully sticks, any squeaky toys, My Dad’s shoes, watches, Sheepdog caps, his soccer referee red and yellow cards, his Samsung cell phone, anything from the recycling bin, especially Dasani water bottles. Anything that is within reach in the front seat or on the dashboard of the Scion xB

Please provide information on your current jobs that DO NOT relate to herding of animals:

I am a Therapy Dog in-training, blogging, providing play-fighting and pursuit game tactics to any canine who will listen, providing Private Detective security.

Please provide information on your relationship with moving motor vehicles:

When I was adopted in December, I really enjoyed LUNGING at passing cars. With careful and thoughtful guidance from My Dad, I have suppressed that urge (unless I am showing off to my canine friends).  My Dad wants you to know that I do not care about FedEx, UPS, or U.S. Mail trucks and that I do not bark in the car…and why is that important?  OK, OK, I will get back to work…

Please provide information on your obedience inclinations:

My Dad and I are always working on something different.  I am VERY good at SIT, SHAKE, DOWN, UP, and minding my own business, especially when strangers and other canines walk by.  The humans passing by always make comments about my good behavior (and how good-looking and handsome I am).  Last week, I finally realized that a Frisbee will not hurt me and My Dad is very happy when I catch the Frisbee.

Please provide your current weight AND your weight when you moved into your current residence:

I was a skinny guy when My Dad adopted me from Great Lakes Border Collie Rescue in early December of 2014, around 33 pounds.  My Dad had me weighed at the vet, last week.  I was 58.2 pounds.  My Dad keeps asking me where I am putting the weight.

Please provide your age:

When the vet examined me in December 2014, she thought I was just a baby, 8 to 12 months old.  My Dad gave me a birthday of February 8th, 2014.  I have VERY white teeth.

Please provide the circumstances of your current living situation:

I live with My Dad, I sleep wherever I want, I get 5 or 6 long walks every day, I get off-leash play with my main girlfriend, Kaya, almost every day, and I go for a lot of rides in the car.

Coco and Lolly are two of my very good friends.  I will lay down to play with them.

Coco and Lolly (foreground) are two of my very good friends. I will lay down to play with them.

On assignment with My Dad.  Nice ears, don't you think?

On assignment with My Dad. Nice ears, don’t you think?

All squeaky toys have their squeakers removed, usually through a small hole in the belly...surgical precision.

All squeaky toys have their squeakers removed, usually through a small hole in the belly…surgical precision.

Coco finds me irresistible, she is always escaping from home and running to my place.

Coco finds me irresistible, she is always escaping from home and running to my place.